Chapter 1: Don't destroy the hive if you want honey.
Such is the human condition. The wrongdoer blames everyone except himself. And so are you and I... We must understand that criticism, like a dove, always returns to its proper place. Those I criticize will find any excuse to defend themselves and return to accuse me.
So, if you want people to resent them to death, use harsh criticism. Otherwise, keep in mind that humans are not always rational. They act based on their emotions, prejudices, arrogance, and snobbery. Criticism is like a fire, but human arrogance is like a storehouse of gunpowder; when they meet, they will explode and cause great harm.
All insane people know how to criticize and blame others. However, understanding and forgiving others require a noble soul and strong self-control.
Chapter 2: An Important Etiquette Secret
If you want to make someone do something against their will, the only way is to make them generate the will to do it.
To determine a person's situation and status, we only need to consider the means he or she employs to satisfy 'delusional lust,' or the desire to be perceived as glorious and glorious by others.
Those who have discovered the secret of satisfying their hunger for praise, which, despite secretly tormenting people, "have everyone in their hands" and are respected and adored by all, obey, "when he dies, the one who digs his grave must also weep for him."
In real life, the more insignificant they perceive themselves to be, the more powerful and famous they perceive themselves to be in their imaginary world. Those people are far happier than we are. They've discovered a way to quench their thirst for fame in their wonderland. They proudly hand me a check for one million dongs or a letter leading me to the Emperor of Persia. If there have been people who have gone insane from a desire for fame, then recognizing the talents of those around us must be an infinite miracle.
Schwab stated: "My most valuable asset is my ability to pique people's interest. Only encouragement and praise can spark and grow one's most valuable talents. The most damaging way to destroy an employee's pride is through verbal criticism of the above. I never chastise anyone. I believe it is preferable to encourage people and provide them to strive. As a result, I'm always ready to offer genuine compliments. I don't regret compliments, and I'm very cautious when it comes to criticism."
What is the distinction between compliments and flattery? On the one hand, he is honest, comes from the bottom of his heart, and is completely selfless, and on the other, he is deceiving to make a profit. Congratulations, everyone is happy. And break the habit of flattery Compliments must be genuine and from the heart! Do not be sorry for your words of thanks and encouragement! And while we may forget those words, those who are praised will rejoice and always remember them.
Chapter 3: Create a desire in people to do the work that we suggest.
Why should we always talk about what we want? is ineffective, naive, and absurd. Sure, we pay attention to what we like, but only to what we like. Because other people only consider what they like, regardless of what we like.
So the only way to persuade others to follow you is to tailor your request to their preferences and show them how to achieve that preference.
"The secret of success, if there is one, is to know how to put yourself in the shoes of others and think both from his position and from your own," Henry Ford said.
Thousands of street vendors wander the streets, tired and frustrated, with little pay. Why? Because they consider them and what they are looking for. They don't realize that neither you nor I want to buy - that is, spend money - but instead want to solve our own problems. However, the salesman who assists us in resolving those issues simply shows us that purchasing their goods or allowing them to assist us will save us money, reduce fatigue, be less upset, and be less in pain. If the future is secure, that person will not force us to buy, but will persuade us to do so!
You must first seduce someone with ardent desire if you want to seduce them. If we succeed, the people in the four pools will become our friends. We will be lost on the road of life if we cannot do it.
Chapter 4: Do you want to be a charming talker? Very simple
Those who only talk about themselves are only concerned with themselves. And "whoever thinks only of himself is clearly uneducated."
So, if you want people to think of you as a charming talker, you must be able to listen.
To be liked, you must "listen attentively; and encourage others to talk about them."
Chapter 5: How to Be Compassionate
So, if you want to make someone happy, please:... Tell them about your interests and goals.
Chapter 6: How to Instantly Make People Like You
You want to find people who agree with you. You want people to recognize your talent. Find yourself in your neighborhood, if you so desire. You despise rude compliments but crave genuine compliments. You want to hang out with your coworkers who are extremely supportive and unapologetic about you. That is something we all want.
So, let us follow the Bible's instruction: "If you want to receive something from people, give it to them."
When should we act in this manner? How?… Where?… Anytime and anywhere is the answer.
So you want to be liked by other people: How can you demonstrate how important they are?
PART 3: 12 WAYS TO GET OTHERS TO THINK ABOUT YOU
10. Don't argue: THE BEST WAY TO RESOLVE DISPUTES IS TO NOT ALLOW THEM TO OCCUR.
From that night forward, I listened intently, watching the outcomes of thousands of debates. I eventually came to the conclusion that the best way to resolve disputes in this world is to avoid quarrels. Avoiding it is similar to avoiding poisonous snakes or earthquakes and volcanoes.
However, the end result of any argument is that no one wins. Because if you lose, you have obviously lost. And even if you win, you will still lose. Why? Simply because when you beat another person when you demonstrate that the opponent's knowledge is poor, his argument is riddled with holes, and his mind is in disarray...meaning you have instilled trust...the person's pride suffers. He will be disappointed or enraged by your victory... And you, exalted by your "victory," have forgotten that when people are forced against their will, they will try to cling to their opinions and views at any cost, from any angle, even the best picture angle. As a result, you ultimately lose.
"If you try to argue to win, it will be a meaningless victory because you will never receive the goodwill and cooperation of the opponent," Ben Franklin said.
Acceptance of disagreement: 'When two partners always agree with each other, only one side's opinion is sufficient. If there is a disagreement, this is your opportunity to make changes before making a major mistake.
Don't put too much stock in first impressions: In an unpleasant situation, our natural reaction is to defend ourselves. Take care. Keep your first reactions calm and cautious. It could be the worst, not the best.
Control your emotions: Remember that making someone angry can help you judge their character.
Listen first: Allow your opponent to speak first. Allow them to speak without interrupting, arguing, or defending themselves, as this will only create barriers. Find ways to bridge the gap between sharing and understanding.
Find common ground: When listening to the other person's presentation, start with the points where you agree.
Admit your mistakes and apologize: Admit your mistakes and apologize. The opponent will lose the weapon, and av2 will reduce resistance.
Consider the opposing viewpoint: Keep in mind that the opposing party may be correct. It's much easier to agree with them now than it is to endure them clapping their hands and saying, "We tried to teach you, but you won't listen," when failure looms. because you insist on doing things your way
Thank your opponent for taking the time to argue with you: Anyone who takes the time to argue with you is interested in what you are concerned about. Consider them to be people who genuinely want to assist you, similar to how you can turn your adversaries into friends.
Allow both parties time to think about the problem before acting: Suggest that you both meet again when you have gathered enough information to bring to the table.
11. RESPECT OTHER PERSPECTIVES. NEVER SAY, "YOU'RE WRONG."
Never argue with a client, your spouse, or those who disagree with you. Never say they are incorrect. Don't irritate them. Handle them with care, politeness, and sincerity.
*The rarest talent is that of a man who recognizes the talent in others - Ernest Hemingway
12. WINNER ACCEPT YOUR WRONG - IF YOU ARE WRONG, BE QUICK TO ACCEPT IT.
Isn't it much easier to criticize oneself than to hear criticism from another?
If we admit our mistakes before others have a chance to speak, we have a 99 percent chance of being treated with generosity, forgiveness, and fewer mistakes.
If you've made a mistake, there's nothing better than admitting it. Giving in is not condescending, nor is admitting fault humiliating. Fenelon -
Always remember that we are dealing with beings who are not only rational but also emotional; they are susceptible to prejudice but always motivated when there is pride. as well as pride Dale Carnegie's
13. IN COMMUNICATION, BEGIN WITH A FRIENDLY ATTITUDE.
If a person's heart is filled with resentment or a grudge against you, no matter how persuasive your arguments are, that person will not listen.
If you want someone to do what you want, you must first demonstrate that you are his genuine friend. Sweet honey in love will capture the heart and open the way to human reason.
A gentle, kind attitude and genuine compliments can persuade people to change their minds more easily than tension or discomfort.
Kindness and good manners are signs of a noble soul. Tagore, R.
Maturity begins when you realize that other people care more about you than you care about yourself - John MacNaughton
14. SOCRATES' SECRETS - ASK QUESTIONS THAT GET AN INSTANT "YES" FROM THE OTHER
You don't start a conversation with differences. On the contrary, we can begin by emphasizing areas where both Ben agrees. If possible, you will continue to emphasize that both are attempting to achieve the same goal, with the only difference being the method of competition. It's far better to say "yes" right away.
When you say something, you feel obligated to stand by it and defend it. As a result, you must allow people to agree with you from the start. That is extremely important.
As a result, if we get a lot of "Yes" from the start, we've paved the way for receiving the final offer - our goal.
He frequently asked questions that required the other person to agree with. Then I led them from one admission to the next, until they "voluntarily agreed" to an opinion, they had vehemently rejected just moments before.
Sharing the most valuable key is the key to opening people's hearts. Or keep in mind that tenderness and love are more powerful than force and anger.
15. Be wise when meeting face-to-face - Make others feel as if they own the conversation.
Most people's test when trying to persuade others to follow their way of thinking is the self-centered NCI. You should allow others to express their opinions. Most of them are more knowledgeable about their jobs and problems than you are. You simply do not inquire and listen to their responses. People respect you not because you talk a lot, but because you listen well. And maturity begins when you are concerned about other people's problems rather than your own.
Bro orators are also becoming increasingly rare. Those who know how to keep quiet at the right time and place are even rarer than those who know how to yield to others. Movado, M.F.
Whoever wants to lead the people knows they must first serve them. - Said Sainimarc
Show more than you, and you will become my adversary. People will become our friends if we know how to yield to them. La Rochefoucauld's
The issues raised are all basic human-to-human interactions. In words, it can now be called a "curriculum" to help you understand yourself and others to succeed in communication. Is it possible to live without communication? How many people are exhausted and unhappy every day as a result of communication issues? How to Win Friends and Influence People is thus a book for everyone. Children should read more than their parents, employees should read more than their bosses, and acquaintances should read more than strangers... That is why, despite being published nearly 80 years ago, How to Win Friends and Influence People remains one of the world's best-selling books.
Perhaps some readers will read this book and think, "The things in this book are simple, who doesn't know?" That's correct because it's all the ground rules, the fundamental ways we interact. "Do not criticize, complain, or complain," "Truly praise and appreciate others," and "Truly make others feel important"... Everyone knows these things are true but are you certain you can remember and do those simple things? As a result, a new book has been created to assist you in your practice.
However, the majority of readers may nod in agreement with every page of the book. Well, if we consider everything calmly, we can behave properly, not hurt others, keep the atmosphere comfortable, and both parties will be happy. As a result, the work appears to be smoother and more successful. However, it is not easy because, in most cases, each person's "me" triumphs over the mind. We frequently make unnecessary mistakes to satisfy it. How to Win Friends and Influence People is also present to remind and assist us in shaping our own "me."
How to Win Friends and Influence People is a rare book that is not picky about readers, with a simple voice, and a close but extremely scientific presentation by extracting the key points at the end of the chapter. Anyone can understand. This is Mr. Dale Carnegie's entire life's work, stemming from Dale's own need to feel that if he had been properly taught how to behave in life, he would not have made so many mistakes in the past. He wrote based on his extensive life experience. He even hired a professional researcher to help him find and research relevant documents. And the book was so useful that it had to be reprinted as soon as it was published, creating an unprecedented phenomenon in England's bleak publishing landscape at the time. Until now, that is.
"How to Win Friends and Influence" People became a book that wouldn't stay on the shelf after that. In addition to the idea of being reprinted continuously around the world, this phrase also means that Mr. Dale has continuously added and edited the book with new stories and expressions, so Dac Nhan Tam has something new at each appearance. This was also carried out by his son after his death, as he had requested.
How to Win Friends and Influence People has lived a life worthy of the price, its actual value, as a book with great influence, translated into most languages in the world, and always in the Top bestsellers in all publishing markets. This is one of the very first mainstream self-help series books. Mr. Dale also became one of the authors who had a direct impact on the positive change of millions of readers all over the world.